More accurate iPhone names

As the iPhone gets older and its naming scheme spirals into marketing nonsense, I thought it might be a good time to give people a better way to describe each generation.

Original Name More Accurate Name
iPhone (2007) iPhone No Keyboard. $500?!?
iPhone 3G (2008) iPhone apps
iPhone 3GS (2009) iPhone Angry Birds
iPhone 4 (2010) iPhone You’re Holding it Wrong
iPhone 4S (2011) iPhone Siri Not Available
iPhone 5 (2012) iPhone Absolute Jewel
iPhone 5C (2013) iPhone Plastic
iPhone 5S (2013) iPhone The Good One
iPhone 6 & 6 Plus (2014) iPhone Wide Boi
iPhone 6S & 6S Plus (2015) iPhone Wide Bois
iPhone SE (2016) iPhone The Good One Again
iPhone 7 & 7 Plus (2016) iPhone Darth Vader
iPhone 8 & 8 Plus (2017) iPhone 7S
iPhone X (2017) iPhone Rich Boi
iPhone XS & XS Max (2018) iPhone Rich Bois
iPhone XR (2018) iPhone Touch

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